Tennessee:Day2
I woke up in a slightly better spirits than I did yesterday. We headed down to breakfast with the rowdy 3-some behind. Krisjon and Krishon were their loud obnoxious selves, as for my tolerance level, well, not so much. I tried, I assure you I did, but I fell apart within minutes.
Tears poured out of my eye sockets mirroring the waterfall I was sitting next to, though I'm sure not nearly as beautiful. I gave a pitiful gaze into my wife's eyes and firmly blurted out "LOOK, I KNOW I am the one who USUALLY handles the kids! I need you to be strong right now and do this, because I just can't right now."
I scooped up a spoon full of hot bland grits and stuck them in my mouth hoping to keep in the wails and expletives I so desperately wanted to let out.
Jon sat next to me and continued making awkward noises, banging on the table and wiping yogurt all over the back of the fancy cloth chair he was sitting in. I just looked over and smiled. It was all I could do. He picked up a slice of pork from his plate and shouted "Mommy, my bacon looks like a smiley face!"
"Indeed it does."
Even through tough times, he always has a way of making me smile. Even if only for a second. I'm a sucker for creativity and seeing a connection in something totally unrelated. He has this same perception. I often forget we are not biologically connected. I know the donor I chose was one I whole-heartedly identified with. But my heart believes God breathed a part of me into this child's soul.
We headed back to the hotel room, Kenya and I got into a huge argument that resulted in us both yelling obscenities , and her throwing her wedding band across the room storming out.
This trip (did I just say trip?) , this move, is getting to all of us. It’s pushing us to the brink of marital demise. I'm hurting, she's stressed. The kids add to the frustration.
We are drowning....hope someone knows CPR.
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